Friday, September 11, 2009

Wow...it's only been....

Four months! Since I posted that is...Got slammed with over time at work, and then the axe fell...they actually laid 35 of us off! Saw it coming, didn't think she'd follow through, then got my notice. The stink of it is, my first day of unemployment was my freakin birthday lol! Thirty two years old, and unemployed for the first time since I started picking in the fields at age nine...So now I sit around and happily wait for my unemployment check to come in, not sure of which direction to take. On the one hand, having a break after so many years of work is kinda nice. I've been able to take on small catering jobs, walk the boy through his first weeks of junior high, and get more involved with friends, family, and the kids' school stuff. On the other hand, I get the feeling of uselessness that is so common among those not working by someone else's choice. I sleep...ALOT, so I know there's something in that. We lost our health insurance, that's a major pain. Gotta figure out where to cut now, and that's never a fun process. But, I'm pretty positive. When one door closes, a window opens, and I think that being laid off was my little clue that it's time to try something new. I would LOVE to get into this sonography program I found, I could handle being an ultrasound tech, and there's no 5-year wait list for the lottery to get in like City and FSU. So here I stand, in the middle of an intersection, not knowing which way to take, but enjoying the fact that at least I have options. Who knows, maybe I'll find my life's calling, and all thanks to a greedy politician that took no notice that her pawns are actually people with families and responsibilities...

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The Power of Women

I am continually amazed with what we put up with as women...and how we overcome basically everything with grace, dignity, and fire. Especially after I've had the opportunity to just chat with friends, it becomes so evident that our struggles seem to be universal, and yet we're so shocked that we all really have the same problems! We internalize everything. We don't ask for help, we just get it done, unless it really can't be done without help. Women possess such a quiet strength, but it's such a force! I wonder why we haven't broken into politics and leadership more than we have, but maybe that just makes us smarter. Let the men fight with their words and have the pissing contest, we end up being the power in the end anyway. I wish women received more recognition for our everyday battles, but perhaps it's better that we don't. Knowing what and who we are and accepting that is recognition in itself. Maybe we should work on quiet recognition of each other and our victories.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Ms. M's debut

Ok, sorry, proud Mama moment...gosh I love that little girl! I don't know who was more nervous, her or me!! Check it out, comment if you like, just remember, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all...remember, she's 9...and thanks!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYUsbampbD8

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Boys...

So last night I had a small gathering of moms with babies, and I mean babies! Had to clean up afterward, and play on the puter, so it was late when I went to bed. Not to mention the buzz coming from Mr. B's room--had to let him have a friend stay over to compensate for the excess estrogen in the house last night...around 10 this morning, B asks me what temp to use while cooking pancakes. Sweet! They're feeding themselves! Success! Course, when I woke up I found they'd used dry cast iron to make said pancakes...and managed to touch multiple surfaces with maple syrup coated hands...but hey--they did it! Proud Mama moment!

105F in the shade...

And what am I doing? Hibernating lol! There's no WAY I'm headed out in this ridiculous heat for anything that's not critical...like...

A water balloon fight...ambushing Mr. B and his little buddy...

The ice cream truck...I swear, it's like radar automatically kicks on during the summer...

The guy with the little cart with a bell on it that sells those awesome frozen fruit and cream bars...

A quick run through the sprinklers...no matter that the tree shades the yard so much the grass only grows on one side! Mud is cool...

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Random Question

Your aunt gave you a maple syrup dispenser shaped as a rooster for your birthday. Now you've got to write her a thank you note! Try it :-)

Dear Aunt,
Wow, thanks for the rooster bottle for my syrup! Nevermind that I don't like syrup, but I'm sure I can find something useful for it...nothin better than thickish liquid comin out of a rooster's butt, right? Thanks again, love and kisses!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Good Decision

I confess, I was one of those “awful” parents who pierced my infant daughter’s ears at a mall kiosk when she was two months old. I sat in the chair in the window, cradling her close and clamping her hands down so she wouldn’t grab the piercing gun at an inopportune time. I made sorrowful expressions when her screams reached those on the other side of the window, and felt the proper shame when they scowled at me. But it was worth it—my beautiful little girl was even more beautiful with a little adornment!

Six months later, her little fingers got caught in her earring somehow, and she ripped one out. I removed the other to allow time for healing. The holes grew shut.

When she was two years old, I took my daughter, again to the mall, to get her ears pierced again. All went well, until she was about 4 years old. Somehow one piercing became infected, so again, I removed both earrings to allow time for healing. They grew shut. Again.

I began suggesting another go round to my daughter when she was six. She put me off, placating me with “We’ll sees”, “Maybe’s” and other such niceties she learned from yours truly. Finally at age seven I think she just got tired of my bothering her. After yet another “suggestion” from me, my daughter replied, “Mom, can’t we just wait a few years until I can make a good decision?”

Uh.

Bad mom! But who does she think she is, talking to me like an adult?!

But....They have WINGS!!!!!

It was a beautiful afternoon, and the kids were restless. I had been promising them for days that we would head to the park so they could ride their bikes and scooters. Living in an apartment has its disadvantages, including lack of safe free space for such activities. Brandon needed to run an obstacle course for Cub Scouts, and the school playground provided the perfect backdrop—parallel bars, monkey bars, slides, and tunnels.

We went to the school playground, parking close to the basketball court and play structures. I timed Brandon for his “obstacle course” and then allowed the kids free time to do whatever they wanted, making as much noise as they wanted. Course, it wasn’t long before they decided to chase each other around, including up the twisting slide. I warned them a few times not to climb up when the other was going down—like they would listen!

As I watched in amusement, Mariah climbed up the twisty slide, knowing full well that her brother was waiting for her at the top, for just the right moment in which to launch himself down the slide. The moment came; Brandon started down the slide, and crashed right into his sister. She turned sideways, cracking the side of her head on the curved edge of the slide before rolling down to the bottom. The two paused briefly at the bottom of the slide, before Mariah let out a piercing scream. She ran to me, shrieking the whole ten yards. Hugging her close, I tried to calm her. Not seeing any obvious injuries, I was confident she’d just been scared. Then I noticed the blood dripping around my hand, which was cupping the side of her head in a hug. Pulling her hair back, I noticed a large split in the skin where her ear met her head. It was bleeding dramatically, but after a minute, I realized it was superficial.

I sent Brandon to the car, for my ever-present first aid kit (it pays to have kids in sports, I tell ya!) He came running back, unable to find the kit. I sent him back to the car for anything remotely tissue like, to stop the blood until we could drive the two blocks home for a proper cleaning. He came back, with a strangely familiar yellow package in hand. “Mom, this is tissue, right?” Yes sweetie, yes my spare maxi pad is tissue, at least for now! Not having anything else handy that was absorbent enough to do the job, I unwrapped the pad—which had wings!—and stuck that puppy right to my daughter’s head. We drove home, with me thankful that no other parents were on the playground that day to laugh at my poor little winged-pad covered girl.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Surpassing your parents

We all want our kids to do better than we do, right? Achieve, succeed, excel? How do you think they will feel later when they really understand that they've surpassed us?

I have far exceeded what my parents did or had...I should be proud, right? I am, to an extent...but it also saddens me...that they just couldn't or wouldn't get over the hurdles they faced...I haven't even spoken to my mother in nearly a decade...but in recent emails, it has become clear that I am more...I don't even know what more! More educated? So what, she was the smartest mom ever, as long as we were together! More beautiful? She's self-deprecating and says that others comment on my "hotness" and she seems embarrassed about her appearance...I'm attractive, in my eyes, but I spent years telling her she was the prettiest Mommy ever, and that is all I see or remember...smarter? She worked three jobs and went to school while my dad worked nights so they could raise us in the most expensive and exclusive city on the West Coast...

I want my kids to be more, bigger, better, than what they knew in their childhoods, but I wouldn't wish this guilt or regret on them for the world...